Last Days

Recently a former caregiver client I coached years ago, presented me with a book she and her dad wrote about the last year with her mom who had Alzheimer's and the first year of his being without her. I am anxious to find the time to read this story. It is called Her Final Year; a Care-Giving Memoir and His First Year; A Journey of Recovery. The authors are James Downey and John Bourke with Martha John and Kathi Bourke. Kathi was my coaching client. In the section How to Use This Book, the authors write,"...some of it is more than a little embarrassing. We have decided to share it, and show it as it was, because we deeply believe that it is extremely important that anyone entering into a care-giving relationship understand the reality of what they will likely experience. You will make mistakes. You will think you are going to go crazy. You will sometimes feel crushed by the isolation and stress. You will sometimes resent, or even hate, the person for whom you are caring. You will get into arguments with family and friends and say and do things you might later regret. These things are all completely normal human reactions to the situation you will be is."
This gives me courage again to write my second book; my journey with me mother in law Bette over 14 years until her death at 99 1/2 years of age in 2009. Thanks Kathi for reminding me to expose true feelings both good, bad and ugly at times, to help others who are going through the caregiving experience. It also is 2 books; the first exploring changes in attitudes and treatment of dementia and the second, a personal story. Perhaps because it has been almost 3 years I'm ready to finish it.